The Connector

All of my thoughts turn towards you. Everything I see, all that I do, it all reminds me of you, of us. And I'm so completely terrified that you're going to forget me.

Maybe I'm in denial about the reality of all of this. When you called with the news, a part of me died. You asked me how I knew it was going to happen this way. When you fear losing someone so important, everything is potentially a red flag.

I think what has struck me the most is that all of my feelings have just intensified ten fold. Maybe something like Christmastime. I now realize how completely I belong to you. My love for you has only been steeled by your absence and when the loneliness comes and I feel that I can barely bear another moment without your sweet presence, that is when I'm most comforted by our countless memories.

I remember saying to you a million times that I thought our situation was ridiculous, but now I'm acutely aware of how wonderfully special our bond really is. I fell in love with you, with all of you, everything you gave me. And I know that I said that I hope I will never have to endure another situation like ours in my life, but the truth is, I would do this a million times a day if it meant getting to have you in my life just one moment longer. Our love is entirely contingent on who we are as individuals to each other. You're not just in love with me. You're in love with who I am. And now I know that's why we're utterly desperate for each other. You don't find this connection with everyone you meet. I love every single piece of who you are. Every thought, every cell, every word. You're my knight in shining armor and I can't count all of the times that you've rescued me.

I didn't get to thank you the other nite. I want to thank you for everything you've done for me. Because I have known you in my life, I have been changed. You have helped me to realize how wonderful another person can be. I believe in love for me because of the way that you love me. You singly taught me that I have worth. And now I believe that if someone as special as you are can care for me, then my life, my heart, my body, and my soul must retain value. Your love has fixed a lot of what has been broken for so long inside of me. Words cannot do justice to express my gratitude for your friendship and your love.

I miss you. I love you. I will be with you forever. I love you.

--
your B.O.S.S.